ASHAMED...

I even typed this punching the keys extra hard.

IS ANYONE ELSE TOTALLY ASHAMED THAT MICHAEL VICK IS AN EAGLE?????

I am. What a complete travesty that the NFL would let such a violent man represent and be a role model for our children.

Words escape me.

Limoncello...

While fast forwarding through commercials the other day, one happened to catch my eye. A picture of a brightly colored bottle of the newest Smirnoff product Lemoncello. I hit that rewind button faster than LF could say, "I want scooby doo!" "Wait, I said, just wait!!" With drool pouring out of my mouth I called Hub to ask if he could pop by the liquor store on the way home. Yes I realized that I was begging for alcohol on a Tuesday but I was in dire straights.The commercial looked so delicious that if not for the presence of my children I would have licked the TV.
And so when Hub came home, I skipped over to him with a ginormous smile and asked, "Didya get it, huh, huh, didya?" "No" he replied soberly, "they did not have it yet."
Sensing the urgency in my voice, I still do not know why he couldn't have checked another store. I will make him pay.

So to Melissa...if you find it call me. I will run out on the spot.

Stop the presses...

I know I haven't told you this yet. On our most recent trips down the shore we have obtained two more additions to our family...Ariel and Prince Eric. No not the little mermaid and her man. But, Hermit crabs. And now, right this minute...Prince Eric is missing. Ummmm........to be continued, I guess.

To my one and only...

Happy Anniversary!! Thank You for 5 happy and fun years together.

A glimpse into the future...

I have to report for Jury Duty at 1pm today. BLURG!!!

If you build it, they will come...

My father built some birdhouses that contained a certain size hole to attract Blue Birds. Not Blue Jays, but Blue Birds. I requested some and had Hub attach them to the fence. We waited and within 3 weeks...we had Blue Birds. My parents are beside themselves that we have the birds nesting and they do not. Everytime my father is over, he grabs my binoculars and scopes the yard. Well on Tuesday I had an upclose perfect picture. This is the first time they have come this close to my house.

The males are the most brilliant color. This picture does no justice.

I hope that I do not come home one day to a missing bird house.

The housewives...

I watch the Real Housewives of New York, so sue me. I DVR it. And I secretly think Hub is hooked too. He says things like "Okay, you can watch it , I don't mind." And then he is screaming at the TV along with me when later in the show Kelly is telling Bethany "You are down here and I am up here."

Last night after the kiddies were all tucked in and snoring, we settled down for a little DVR catch up time. I had taped the preview of the newest Bravo extravaganza "The Real Housewives of New Jersey". The "Housewives" are composed of 2 sisters, 1 sister-in-law, and 2 outsiders. It premiers on May 12th. I might have a party. I think it will be nothing short of total entertainment and Hub will be the dying to watch.

Here is how I compare/do not compare to my fellow New Jersey Housewives.

• I used to have big hair.
• I will never own a strip club/car wash. Unless the owners of KingPin decide the company needs a new direction.
• I will never, ever say the word "bubbies" when describing my boobies.
• When entering a jewelery store, I will never be greeted with the following statement, "I knew that you liked turquoise, so when this turquoise and diamond ring came in I just thought of you right away."
• And although I would love someday to push a table aside and start throwing fists, I don't think I will ever get the opportunity. I try not to dine with people who would make me feel the need to punch them.

Yes, another gym story...

I know that all I have been blogging about lately is the gym, but I can't help it. I never understood people when they claimed to be addicted to the gym. I now know and think it may be an obsession. I actually went twice yesterday. Let me explain, though. I went on my way home from work to get in a quickie on the elliptical and to not have to drag the kids there later. When we finished dinner early last night, LF asked if we could go to the gym. Hub wanted to run anyway and I thought I would just soak in the hot tub. What I actually did was abdominal crunches and a uphill, slow walk on the treadmill.

This is where I had a revelation. Kind of.

As I walked next to Hub who was running next to me, I noticed that he changed his time counter. Instead of it counting how much time was left in the workout, his was counting up to tell how much time has past.

I like to see that I only have 10 minutes to go. And I know that I could just remind myself at the 20 minute mark...10 more minutes and done. But I like to see it in bright red and seconds still counting down.

So which one of us is half empty and which is half full?

You look great...for your age...

As you all know we joined a gym. Included with our membership is three sessions with a trainer. I went for my first on Tuesday. She measured every body part and told me my devastating fat to muscle ratio. She then made me do push-ups to "see how many I could do without breaking stride". I assure you, my sis would have been embarrassed at the measly and barely accomplished without a heart attack two push-ups. I did however do 20 sit-ups. The trainer was kind of impressed, as too was I.
Okay, so with the fitness evaluation completed, I was given a green card to work out on the circuit. We went through about ten weight lifting machines and marked down the weight in which I was comfortably challenged.
This was our little chit chat last night while performing my circuit lifting.
The rather handsome and young(age 24)trainer: How old are you?
Me: 32.
Mean trainer that actually himself looks older than 24: really, you don't look that old.
Me: Thank You?????

Now I had a somewhat similar conversation with my Step-mother in law not too long ago. She does look fabulous "for her age". She was at a meeting with some male colleagues who obviously do not know the rules of never ask a women's age, so they went ahead and asked. Julie told and they replied Wow, you don't look that old, you look great.

My question is this, Are we women supposed to feel complimented by this? Thoughts please!!!!

Do you want an apple my pretty...

I lunched with Hub and Monk today. I was informed that there was a bet placed on my reaction to a fairly large itinerary change involving the Myrtle golf trip occurring the first weekend in June. The airline cancelled the 10pm returning flight on Saturday night. Now hub will land on Sunday morning at 10am. He assures me there is nothing to be done.

Isn't it a coincidence that the only flights that have ever been changed or cancelled are the returning flights. I have never heard, "Bad news we have to leave a day later this year." Never, ever, ever have I heard that.

So, that and the fact that this will be the second time I am going to the gym without the motivational songs of the IPOD, I bought myself a little apple treat.

An IPOD shuffle. It's mini, it's brilliantly blue and it's all mine.

Hub, whatever money you won or didn't win from Monk. That is your contribution to my fitness routine.

My sis...

My little sister came back to us bigger and badder than ever. Meg has been away for 3 months learning how to conquer the bad guys. She was beaten, maced, and electrocuted. She is physically fitter and mentally stronger. And she can now do an exorbitant amount of push ups. You should feel her Popeye muscles.

Things I recently learned from my sister:

1. If you stay focused you can accomplish things for which you were not in the slightest prepared.
   
2. With a simple lift of the legs and a twist to the side you can lift a 200 lb man from on top of you.
   
3. I really did miss her giddiness and naivety. I hope that is not gone with her new found power.
   
   
   
   

It's been a while...

I know it's been a while since I have blogged. I truely have been busy with guitar and getting my summer body ready.

If you have a free moment, scroll over my blog roll or click on This Magic Moment.

I just had to throw a little shout out to my friend Melissa. She shot some pretty awesome pics of my kids last week.

On Australia...

Yesterday was a day spent repainting my bathroom. When my mom stopped in to check my progress, she left the movie Australia on the counter. She had nothing but praises for this movie. The only catch...it's THREE HOURS LONG!!! I thought, no way will I ever find time to watch this. Well last night somehow I did. And let me just pass on...it is probably my most favorite movie so far.

I don't know if it's because since I became a mother I now see certain things differently. I don't know where the three hours went. I don't know how this did not get better feedback.

I'm just saying, there is action, romance, and love. It pulls at your heartstrings. If you ever have an extra three hours to spare, most definitely rent this movie.

A Hobbiest wronged...

I have a couple little hobbies. One is backyard birdwatching. I have a couple bird feeders and some birdhouses. My feeders attract all sorts of little flyer's...blue jays, cardinals, starlings and of course, junta's (right mom?) Well just now I witnessed a hawk tearing apart one of my little moochers. I never thought in a million years I would be providing lunch for the carnivores of the bird species. It was an awesome sight although I do have a tinge of regret. As if I am making the circle of life that much easier for the hunter. I hope this does not ever happen again.

On Politics...

I do not claim to know much. And, although I did not vote for President Obama, I do think he has many great qualities and views. Having said that the following is a list of things I will now do after watching his first public news conference:

1. I am digging a bomb shelter in my backyard.
2. Every time I see a member of the media, I will spit on the ground in disgust.
3. I am going to start stashing my cash and pretending to have absolutely nothing.
4. I am NOT going to pay my mortgage.
5. I will hope that the terrorist's think they have succeeded in bringing America's economy down and take pity on us.
6. When my brother leaves for Afghanistan with the President's troop surge...I will cry my eyes out.
   
   
   

The Call of the Wild...

With duck season over,Hub has started practicing for yet another fowl hunting stretch. On Sunday after a long day of shopping (for camping stuff), we returned home for some duck dinner. Well you know how that went. After supper, down to the basement we went for some energy release.

Amongst the toddler screams and the baby whines was the heavy sound of ...turkey calls. Yep, you heard it right, turkey calls. Hub slipped one under the radar and bought a little plastic thingy that fits into his mouth named a diaphragm turkey caller. He has to recite different sounds in order to obtain just the right clatter or cackle or clucker or purr or whatever it's called.

So while I expected a nice quiet, wind down evening what I listened to was Kit, Kit, Kit, Cat, Cat, Cat , Chalk, Chalk, Chalk, Purrrr,Purrrr, Purrrr, extremely loud with a diaphragm turkey caller.

To Hub: this next clip will prove that you really only need to make crazy noises in order for the turkey to respond.

An admission...

On Friday night, Hub started the defrost of Sunday's succulent duck dinner. Saturday afternoon began the marination process. Sunday morning I admitted to my hopeful husband that I was not looking forward to our feast. Sunday afternoon was the application of the bacon strips. Sunday early evening Hub admitted that he also was a little leery.

WHAT!!! He is making me sample this duck that he "harvested" and he is apprehensive. BLURG!!

I think he got the wrong idea of me on Saturday's date night. Hub used trickery to succeed in getting me to a fancy schmancy seafood restaurant. (meaning he failed to tell me it was a seafood restaurant) I do not eat seafood. But for the first time in my life I ordered fish. He was totally shocked.

Anyway a little background, ever since I was pregnant with my first 3+ years ago, I have been having meat issues. I know that it is mind over matter. I think about it way to much. I still am a carnivore, I just do not always finish my plate.

So when all was said and done. I did not even taste the duck. I could not even bring myself to test it. I think Hub was a little disappointed. Like he provided for his family some tasty meat but his family had Deluxe Kraft mac and cheese instead. He admitted to the duck being just okay. And also said that I would not like it.

He will "harvest" again, he claims. This time using a different recipe. Maybe I'll hold my nose and take a little bite.

Girls Night Out...

So we have a little GNO planned tonight. Much needed for all. Enjoy this next little quip:

The other night I was invited out for a night with the girls. I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, 'I promise!' Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easily. Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hallway started up and cuckooed 3 times.

Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. (Even when totally smashed... 3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals = 12 cuckoos MIDNIGHT!)

The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, I told him 'MIDNIGHT'. He didn't seem mad in the least. Whew, I got away with that one!

Then he said 'We need a new cuckoo Clock.' When I asked him why, he said, 'Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said 'oh s**t.' Cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted.

Ha! Now you know you just had to laugh, right?
Have fun girls!!!

A true South Jerseyian...

Hub did not think anyone would get it, but alas Nikki came through...The Berlin Mart. You others should be ashamed if you did not know. And if you have never been, please go, if only to people watch. I literally walked around with a pen and paper and took notes. There was so much more to write, I kept it to the minimum so as to not scare you away.

I just went on the website. It's actually very inviting. It boasts of free discounts and gifts to everyone arriving on a Bus Tour.

Also, you should bring your kids. Everyone else does. The arcade is like a free babysitting service.

I assure you that you will never forget how it smells. It's not good or bad. It's just unique.

A Day Off...

Because we have live in babysitters this weekend, Hub decided that we needed a day together. Where does he take me you ask? I almost don't want to tell you...actually I won't. Those who live here or have ever lived here should be able to guess from my list.

The only place:

• At 10:30am, alcohol smells from the passersby.
• A women chewing tobacco, that would put any pro baseball player to shame.
• We went there in search of camouflage (another post, another time), could not find camouflage, but everyone was wearing camouflage.
• The bathroom attendant was sitting in the corner, smoking a long cigarette, not tending to the bathroom.
• The only vendor truly making money was the one selling XXXX DVD's outside in 29 degree weather.
• The bar inside boasted of a delicious clams and beer. The catch...it only serves O'Doul's.
• A last but certainly not least. This will probably give it away too. The only vendors that had lines sold soft serve ice cream and soft pretzels. Oh and all the kids were in the Arcade.

If you do not know as to which fine establishment I am speaking, you can not truly say you are from South Jersey.